Letter · 10 March 45 BC · Asturae

Ad Atticum 12.16

Ad Atticum 12.16

Headnote

Cicero to Atticus, written from Astura on the sixth day before the Ides of March 709 AUC — 10 March 45 BC (the manuscript dateline: Scr.\ Asturae vi Id.\ Mart.\ a.\ 709 (45)). A single unnumbered paragraph in the manuscript tradition. The letter answers an offer from Atticus to leave his Roman business and come to Astura: Cicero refuses, saying he will come himself if Atticus is held up longer. The acknowledgement that follows is plain — if there were any relief, it would be in Atticus alone — and the qualifier is even plainer: nothing so far has in fact helped him in any way.

The middle of the letter is a small clinical inventory of failed places: Atticus’s town house “was not thought right for me,” Cicero’s own he could not bear, even somewhere nearer to Rome would not in fact put him with Atticus, because the business that holds Atticus now would hold him then too. Astura’s solitudo suits him best of any of them — but L.\ Marcius Philippus, his neighbour at Astura (stepfather of Octavian), arrived the previous evening, and Cicero fears the solitude will be broken. The closing sentence, me scriptio et litterae non leniunt sed obturbant, is the counterweight to 12.14.3: where yesterday writing held him back from the worst of the force, today it bewilders him. The register flexes day by day.

I do not want you to leave your own business and come to me; I will rather come to you, if you are held up longer. Although I would not have gone out of your sight at all, had any single thing in any way helped me. If there were some relief to be had, it would be in you alone, and as soon as it can come from anyone, it will come from you. Even now, for all that, I cannot bear to be without you. But neither was your house thought right for me, nor could I bear my own, nor, if I were anywhere nearer, would I therefore be with you. The same thing that hinders you from being with me now would hinder you then. Nothing so far has suited me better than this solitude — which I fear Philippus will break up. He had arrived yesterday evening. Writing and books do not soothe me but bewilder me.
te tuis negotiis relictis nolo ad me venire, ego potius accedam, si diutius impediere. etsi ne discessissem qui dem e conspectu tuo, nisi me plane nihil ulla res adiuvaret. quod si esset aliquod levamen, id esset in te uno, et cum primum ab aliquo poterit esse, a te erit. nunc tamen ipsum sine te esse non possum. sed nec tuae domi probabatur nec meae poteram nec, si propius essem uspiam, tecum tamen essem. idem enim te impediret quo minus mecum esses, quod nunc etiam impedit. mihi nihil adhuc aptius fuit hac solitudine; quam vereor ne Philippus tollat. heri enim vesperi venerat. me scriptio et litterae non leniunt sed obturbant.

Cite this passage

Ad Atticum 12.16

Pick a format and click Copy. The permalink jumps any reader to this exact section.

Support this project

Free to read here. Buy the ebook to support the work.

Kindle