Letter · 20 August 45 BC · in Tusculano

Ad Familiares 7.24

Ad Familiares 7.24

Headnote

Cicero to M. Fadius Gallus, written from the Tusculan villa around 20 August 45 BC. The matter at hand is the singer Tigellius Sardus — one of Caesar’s intimates, lampooned later by Horace — whose ill-will toward Cicero, Gallus had been working (a touch fussily, in Cicero’s view) to repair. Cicero is having none of it. He cites Cipius, the legendary Roman husband who pretended to be asleep at the right moments: “I am not asleep for everyone”; just so, “I am not at every man’s service.” The pose recovered: in his consular pomp he was less besieged by suitors than he now is, in retirement, by Caesarians — Tigellius alone excepted, whom he will count as so much clear gain forgone, and whom he supposes Calvus Licinius (the iambic poet, in the manner of Hipponax) already has fully bought up in scurrilous verse.

The second section gives the specific grievance. Cicero had taken on the case of his friend Phamea, but the trial day Phamea proposed collided with the panel for P. Sestius; Cicero offered any other day Phamea liked. Phamea — relying, as Cicero notes acidly, on a grandson who was a passably good piper and a masseur of his own — went off in a huff. So much, Cicero says, for “Sardinians for sale, each worse than the next,” the proverbial tag (the slave-market joke about Sardus the captive having sired Sardinian Tigellius). The Perseus dateline is circa xiii K. Sept., i.e.\ about 20 August 45 BC. The letter closes by asking Gallus for his Cato — Gallus had written one of the encomia of Cato Uticensis that the year’s literary contest prompted — which Cicero “ought to be ashamed,” for both their sakes, not yet to have read.

Wherever I turn, I find traces of your affection — most recently in the matter of Tigellius; I could see from your letter how hard you had been working at it. I am grateful for the goodwill. But a word or two on the case. Cipius, I think, was the man who said long ago, “I am not asleep for everyone.” Just so, my Gallus: I am not at every man’s service. And yet what service is this? When I was thought to reign, I was less courted by anyone than I now am, in these times, by all Caesar’s intimates — with this man as the one exception. I count it as profit not to have to put up with a fellow more pestilential than his own country; and I take him to be wholly the property by now of Calvus
amoris quidem tui, quoquo me verti, vestigia, vel proxime de Tigellio; sensi enim ex litteris tuis valde te laborasse. amo igitur voluntatem. sed pauca de re. Cipius opinor, olim: ’ non omnibus dormio.’ sic ego non omnibus, mi Galle, servio. etsi quae est haec servitus? olim cum regnare existimabamur, non tam ab ullis quam hoc tempore observor a familiarissimis Caesaris omnibus praeter istum. id ego in lucris pono, non ferre hominem pestilentiorem patria sua; eumque addictum iam totum puto esse Calvi
Licinius’s Hipponactean billing. But see what he is huffing about. I had taken on Phamea’s case, for Phamea’s own sake; he was a close friend of mine. He came to me and told me that the juror had decided to hear his cause on the very day on which the consilium had to convene on the case of P. Sestius. I answered that there was simply no way I could do it; if he took any other day he liked, I would not fail him. He, knowing he had a pretty piper for a grandson and a passably good masseur as well, took his leave of me — rather angry, as it seemed to me. So there you have your “Sardinians for sale, one worse than the next.” You know my side of it, and the unfairness of that swaggerer. Send me your Cato; I am eager to read it. That I have not yet read it is a disgrace to us both.
Licini Hipponacteo praeconio. at vide quid suscenseat. Phameae causam receperam ipsius quidem causa; erat enim mihi sane familiaris. is ad me venit dixitque iudicem sibi operam dare constituisse eo ipso die quo de P. Sestio in consilium iri necesse erat. respondi nullo modo me facere posse; quem vellet alium diem si sumpsisset, me ei non defuturum. ille autem, qui sciret se nepotem bellum tibicinem habere et sat bonum unctorem, discessit a me, ut mi videbatur, iratior. habes ’Sardos venalis alium alio nequiorem.’ Cognosti meam causam et istius salaconis iniquitatem. ’Catonem’ tuum mihi mitte; cupio enim legere. me adhuc non legisse turpe utrique nostrum est.

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Ad Familiares 7.24

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